Thoughts on Wolf by Wolf by Ryan Graudin

Book description:

The year is 1956, and the Axis powers of the Third Reich and Imperial Japan rule the world. To commemorate their Great Victory over Britain and Russia, Hitler and Emperor Hirohito host the Axis Tour: an annual motorcycle race across their conjoined continents. The victor is awarded an audience with the highly reclusive Adolf Hitler at the Victor's ball.

Yael, who escaped from a death camp, has one goal: Win the race and kill Hitler. A survivor of painful human experimentation, Yael has the power to skinshift and must complete her mission by impersonating last year's only female victor, Adele Wolfe. This deception becomes more difficult when Felix, Adele twin's brother, and Luka, her former love interest, enter the race and watch Yael's every move. But as Yael begins to get closer to the other competitors, can she bring herself to be as ruthless as she needs to be to avoid discovery and complete her mission?

Finished this book two weeks ago and I can’t stop thinking about it so I thought I’d write down some thoughts about it.

This book has made it official that alternative history books are becoming one my favorites genres to read. Ryan’s previous book, The Walled City about a settlement in Hong Kong that actually existed which was largely ungoverned was done so well so I had faith in Wolf by Wolf.

I went in not knowing much except that the setup was: what if someone killed Hitler?

I was pleasantly surprised by the X-Men aspect to it when it comes to Yael’s ability to shapeshift. We meet our main character while she’s on her way to a concentration camp and she’s handpicked by a doctor to undergo experimentation. It felt totally realistic and not hard to imagine that in this crazy time experiments were taking place with a disturbing mix of chemicals that would change a person.

Being able to modify her appearance with just a thought was such a great addition to this story because we get to go see Yael go through an identity crisis that felt entirely believable.

Due to years training with the resistance, Yael learned a wide range of academic and physical abilities. She can fight, shoot, and speak numerous different languages. Because of this and her ability to change her face, Yael is selected by the resistance to pose as a previous victor of the contest that is the setting of the novel; a transnational motorcycle race called the Axis Tour. The collaboration between Hitler and Emperor Hiroto is supposed to maintain this peace between the two countries because in this world, America never got involved and the Axis powers were able to seize control of most of the western hemisphere. SCARY. The race goes from Berlin (called Germania in this) all the way to Tokyo.

We get to go through the journey with Yael when she takes the place of the previous winner Adele. Adele Wolfe stole her twin’s papers in order to race because up to that point, women were not allowed to compete. The mission of course becomes complicated because while she has the mechanical details down like, motorcycle racing, imitating Adele’s behavior or committing her life story to memory, a person is more than just an assembly of details. Adele had some secrets of her own and having to deal with them when Adele’s brother Felix joins the race and Adele’s love interest, Luka makes thing complicated, so the race becomes more of a challenge for Yael.

The most thought-provoking part of the story is that Yael is literally wearing the face of her oppressors so after growing up being treated as less than human, she now has the privilege of being able to walk around freely one of them. Mindfuck much? I think that’s so great because race and privilege are at the forefront of many important conversations that we are talking about currently.

I also enjoyed that this book includes diversity because half of the twenty contestants of the race are from Germany and the other half are Japanese. Ryan takes the time to name all of the Japanese contestants and we get to know some of them past their name and description because of certain situations that happen in the book and it’s just great. At one point in the story, Yael even takes on the face of a woman of color when the race is in Egypt, which is just like yes for the detail. That’s so important to a story about Hitler because he literally thinks of an entire race as less than human so to just highlight the people of color makes for an even better fleshed out story.

Even with all the YA elements, such an important element of the story is the revenge aspect and with everything going on, we never forget that.  With the fusion of alternate history, historical fiction and science fiction along with the growing desperation Yael has to get revenge, we get to know about how unwavering, gutsy, vulnerable and emotional she is. Having to fake emotions turns into Yael beginning to care for the people Adele is close to.  The element of danger is always there because we fear that her cover is going to be blown along with having to worry about the inherent danger of the crazy race going on. I think the tragedy of what happened in this time in history is always highlighted and this was a unique and horrifying twist on it.  

As the book finished, I found myself wanting more. Since this is a duology, there will be a sequel which is exciting because having more of this world will be and excellent reminder of our devastating past and the maybe naive idea that only by knowing our history can we avoid reliving it. 

Thoughts on Illuminae by Amie Kaufman & Jay Kristoff

The year is 2375 and one of the mega-corporations, BeiTech that controls much of deep space has just started an intergalactic war by destroying Kady Grant and Ezra Mason's planet, Kerenza. By the way, they just broke up and were trying to avoid each other but of course everything has changed. They're forced to run away on a small fleet of rescue ships while an enemy warship is chasing.

Ezra ends up on the battlecarrier Alexander while Kady is on the science vessel Hypatia and the feeling of safety does not last long because one of BeiTech's ships, the Lincoln, is after them. The book is set up as a file to a mysterious group called Illuminae so by relaying the story through a series of interview transcripts, emails, internet chats, computer logs, and transcripts of security footage we are able to slowly unravel why the attack on the small ice planet of Kerenza evolved into the death of thousands of people. By setting up the story in this way, the deadly plague Phobos that is mutating and therefore creating terrifying mutated killers on the Alexander is even more horrifying as is the self-aware AI, AIDAN, on the Hypatia that has caused too much death when it's supposed to be protecting everyone and justifying it with the chilling question, "Am I Not Merciful?"

Kady and Ezra are high schoolers thrust into this mess who show just how intelligent and cunning they are when nobody in charge will tell them what's going on so they have to take matters into their own hands. Kady is a badass techie with some amazing hacking skills who has to reconnect with her ex-boyfriend in order to bring forth all the shady business that has been going in with the military and these mega-corporations. Ezra is an angry sarcastic combat pilot who is easy to make some snap judgments but is unexpectedly romantic and when this is paired with Kady's determination and sass show just how different they are but how they totally work.

As Kady uncovers more information in this complex network that we're presented with, we realize just how brave and selfless she really is.

The standout to me in this book was how stunning the writing was and it just made me stop and
reread things several times. On the flip side, the IM's felt a bit much after a while but they are still necessary to set up the story and to make you care for the background characters that you only know through their harsh way of commanding troops on these ships or just showing how connected these people became through this difficult work.



                                     


It took me a while to get into the style of the book since it is so unconventional but once I did I found it easy to follow. The eccentric set up- sometimes you even have to turn the book upside down to read it as pictured above- is something unique and I felt I had to brace myself with the turn of every page because you just don't know what's going to happen in this horror, sci-fi adventure ride.

Lastly, I feel the need to expand on the brilliance that is the horrifying AI that is AIDAN. This AI is a personification of everything we as humans fear, that technology becomes self-aware, but the twist in this story is how these authors manage to make the AI seem to be on the brink of feeling...human?! When I started to feel feelings for the AI, I knew that these two had a good thing going in this book. Especially in a story set up this way with everything being technology based, it's easy to assume that it could come of as frigid, matter-of-fact or passionless but it's the complete opposite.

Illuminae shows how empathetic and full of intensity humanity can be and it's worth the read so you can feel all these emotions for yourself.

I can't wait for the sequel, Gemina!

Favorite reads of 2015

This was a difficult list to bring together so thank goodness for Goodreads because after having read 82 books I had no idea how to even begin to narrow it down to my favorites.  

The Book of Unknown Americans by Cristina Henriquez

This book is beautiful and so real and I love feeling represented in books I read. It's like authors saying "I see you, I hear you & I understand." One of many examples: "I wasn't allowed to claim the thing I felt and I didn't feel the thing I was supposed to claim." referring to feeling American but not being viewed as one by your peers and the conflicting emotions that follow. This book is an emotional, unique look at the immigrant experience from many perspectives and definitely worth a read.

The Girl by Madhuri Blaylock

This book is so good and I feel like everyone needs to know about it. All the characters are so fleshed out and different and YES. Dev is a hybrid, half demon, half angel and she's awesome. We get to go through her ups and downs with her and it's easy to connect to her in a way. Wyatt is a warrior and we get to see how as soon as he meets Dev there's a connection. Like when I say their chemistry is off the charts like it jumps off the page. Ryker is his partner in crime, brother, all the words to connect these two because they understand each other like no one else can. Jools is Wyatt's sister and she's a firecracker! Darby is a vampire and she's like a female Magnus Bane mixed with Lestat to me. I love her sassiness and her intense connection to Wyatt and Ryker. Lastly, the Breslins are deliciously evil and my love of villains was just cemented in reading about them.  Madhuri's characters need to be experienced by all. I haven't even delved into the story itself because just go experience it for yourself. The entire trilogy is just a journey that will fill you with all the emotions.

Colorless Tsukuru Tazaki and His Years of Pilgrimage by Haruki Murakami

This story shows how something that happens when you're younger can have a powerful impact on how you view the rest of life. This is my second book I’ve read by Murakami and I really enjoy how he writes, specifically the descriptions of how Tsukuru views people as they board the train at stations was just beautiful to me. I can’t wait to keep reading more books by him this year.

The Secret History  by Donna Tartt

The only reason I thought I didn’t enjoy this book as much as I did was my strong dislike of the characters throughout most of the novel but that's the point. These aren't likeable people, they're despicable in many aspects and you still grow to care for them. This book set in an elite boarding school is about drugs, crime and how knowledge can be power. Richard, the narrator, reminded me of Nick from Gatsby in certain ways because while he did not have money, he shows how easy it is to let yourself be smitten by it. Therefore, he was the perfect narrator because of the change we got to go through with him. What intrigues me is what if we would've gotten this from Henry's, Camilla's or Francis' or even Bunny's point of view? Bunny is a clear picture of the worst kind of person in that even when his family doesn't have that much money, he is so uppity and egotistical. I also loved that Richard is deciding to write this story years after the fact and therefore leaves things to the imagination; it adds so much more to it for me. All in all, I loved this look at the lives of these people and even the setting of this story, typewriters and letters in the mail, just adds to the mystery.

salt. By Nayyirah Waheed
A collection of stunning poems about race that is just done in such a beautiful and profound way.

A Thousand Pieces of You  by Claudia Gray

This was such a fun read. The writing is beautiful and Marguerite is such a great narrator as she takes us through these parallel dimensions. I loved the first one, the details like the futuristic holograms in the calls and of course Russia because of the wealth but also because of the old school from the letters to the modes of transportation to the royalty aspect. Claudia does a great job of describing it all and I totally could imagine this cold, beautiful place. The parallel universes just add to this story but the important part is just the love in this family and how it transcends time and space. 

Ten Thousand Skies Above You by Claudia Gray

In this second book, I could totally see that Warverse and the Russian mob version. A great part of this sequel is the growth that Marguerite goes through. She can no longer depend on her genius parents and their graduate students to explain things to her; she had to go out there and get into these crazy life threatening situations and come out a stronger human. I love that it wasn't just a simple solution. Nothing is an easy fix in this story, not the science, not the feelings she feels for her family and these two important men in her life, Paul & Theo, and especially not the different versions of herself that she jumps into in every dimension. Every version just added to her understanding of who she was and how to see the world differently and broadly and that was brilliant.

Afterworlds by Scott Westerfeld

This book made me so happy. Since being wrapped up in the world of booktube and social media and such it’s easy to feel like you know so much about publishing, so it was great to read about the struggle of editing your first draft while reading the novel itself. Brilliant concept, Westerfeld.  Darcy driving Imogen crazy with all her insecurities about her first book while Imogen was trying to figure out her next book was such a fun dynamic. Darcy and Imogen were the cutest. Yes for LGBT representation! I loved the other authors we got glimpses of like Kiralee and how you can have fun and compare them to whoever your favorite authors are in real life. The story within the novel was brilliantly done. Darcy's fear of changing her ending came through the pages and I was even scared for her. I think the ending she chose was great. Westerfeld knows what he's doing y'all.

The Mime Order by Samantha Shannon

This is the sequel of The Bone Season and this one was a whirlwind. This sequel takes Paige, the main character, back to London and you get to learn so much about Scion and the world Samantha has created. I loved getting into the nitty gritty of the mime lords and queens and the crazy way this citadel runs. This is so important because it really sets up this world for what is going to be a wild ride in books to come. I am so happy about how much Paige grew so much in this; she's smart, genuine about her feelings and how they will get in the way of things but that's what's important and it's only going to get crazier from here. She's becoming one of my favorite leading ladies. 

Lastly, no spoilers but this sequel gave me chills at how you can draw a parallel to things going on in the world and two instances really stood out to me:


Paige: "Why don't we do something?" The frustration almost choked me. Chat: "Apathy's a killer. The way most people see it, we can survive like this if we stay out of the way."
Paige: "Isn't hope just another kind of naïveté?"Warden: "Hope is the lifeblood of revolution. Without it, we are nothing but ash, waiting for the wind to take us.”

Just One Day by Gayle Forman

Allyson and Willem aka the ultimate OTP.  It’s the last day of Allyson’s graduation European tour when she meets Willem and he invites her to forget everything and go to Paris with him. She goes and this day is everything; a whirlwind of emotions and romance. The travel is my favorite part and the identity. & the sequel Just One year and novella, Just One Night are just as good.

Six of Crows by Leigh Bardugo

A heist novel and so much more!

Goodreads review because it’s still what I feel :]

Kaz is a genius and and I can't wait to see what crazy antics, him and his group get up to next. Kaz is such a great reader of people and while people can think he's on the losing end, he knows what cards to play next so the game is always leaning in his favor. The way Leigh unraveled his backstory was brilliant as well. The way she slowly showed how interconnected the group is brilliant as well. I fell in love with Inej, Nina, Jesper, Mathias and even Wylan. This unlikely group seems like a ticking time bomb itself and with every chapter there is so much that can go wrong and oh while it did, I would cheer whenever something did go well. I can't wait to see what plans Kaz has next because man oh man, he's going to need all the help he can get. With the way it ended, it seems like there's many ways this can go if he continues to play his cards oh so carefully. 

Queen of Shadows by Sarah J. Maas

Spoilers because it’s the 4^th in the series and just yeah.

This is an amazing addition to the Throne of Glass series. I didn't think I could love some of these characters more than I already did. Aelin is at her best. She is a cunning, smart individual. I can go on ad nauseum about how much I dig her. The relationships with the people around her just made the story for me. Being a Queen is no joke and anyone that doubted her can surely shush after reading this. The multitude of ways in which she showed off how she can handle any situation thrown at her was impressive. I was like Aedion just jaw open while reading many scenes. While this series is about the growth of our beautiful main character, the people that surround her are full of depth. Rowan, Aedion, Chaol, Dorian Lysandra, Nesryq are just multifaceted, wonderfully fleshed out characters that I love getting to know more and more. Something I didn't have strong feelings about in the third book was the Manon and the witches storyline and this book shut me right up. I grew to care so much about Manon and Asterin. The Thirteen are a force to be reckoned with and I can't wait to see how this all evolves in the last two books.

Winter by Marissa Meyer

The finale of the Lunar Chronicles made me such a happy human. I love how much time was given to each storyline and it was all so detailed and just yes A+ Marissa Meyer. This series has been a crazy ride from Cinder to Scarlet and Cress and now with Winter, we get such a great look at just how far these characters have come. This is a fairy tale retelling that if you haven’t read you should get on that because it’s just such a fun time and the couples from Cinder and Kai, Scarlet and Wolf, Cress and Thorne to Winter and Jacin need to be enjoyed by all. Cyborg Cinderella is my favorite because of course with Cress aka Rapunzel as a close second because having her backstory being her imprisoned in a satellite since childhood is just so perfect and her romanticized view of things is just beautiful but heartbreaking.  The settings of New Beijing and Luna are great in that we really get to appreciate this world with humans, cyborgs and lunar people just that much more.

Favorite line forever and ever amen: "I would suggest that no one use my youth to believe that I am also ignorant."

I think I've gushed on enough. Let's talk favorite books on twitter @bettyreads or down below, friends. 

The Importance of Diversity in Books

I'm currently halfway through Inheritance by Malinda Lo [if you haven't read this duology, fix that please!] and it's surfaced a lot of my thoughts and feelings on diversity in books yet again.

The main female protagonist in this story, Reese, is thought to be straight by most but is struggling with her bisexuality while being white and publicly dating David who is Asian American. This is where my thoughts went crazy. I'm not going to touch on her sexuality in this post  but that will probably get another post because there's great conversations about this being had in this book as well. Anyways about a chapter ago in my reading, Reese went to a party with David and was disconcerted and slightly uncomfortable when she noticed how she was one of the few white people there amidst all of his Asian friends.

I literally put the book down because it's amazing how important this scene is because it shows how different social situations are for white people and people of color. All I notice and feel is my otherness when I arrive in a social setting like a party because in most situations, I am one of the only people of color in the room. Since I have lighter skin I might be able to "blend in" [a term which has many negative connotations within itself because it implies that anything else is other/wrong], but as soon as an opinion is needed on something of Hispanic/Latino culture or etc, I am the one they turn to, in most cases. The assumptions that come with that is something else completely. SO MANY LAYERS to this y'all, I could go on, incoherently, forever.

So when Reese commented on how that was the first time she was able to put herself in someone else's shoes, I just was weirdly relieved because it's like 'yes, someone gets it' but then there are these negative thoughts that came with that relief. Negative because I'm still identifying with one of the first times this white girl is realizing how different the world is outside the bubble she grew up in, while people of color live in that difference and discomfort every day.

The reason for this post is to once again highlight and scream from the mountaintops how important diversity is in literature! 

Reese is in a weird situation in this brilliant sci-fi world Malinda has crafted but she is still privileged there's no doubt about that. Her upbringing allowed her to be blind to the injustices surrounding her until all the crazy alien things started happening. Her enlightenment on the deeper issues at hand began when she read comments online about David's race, something she had never had thought about. *whisper shoutssss*: privilege! She never had to think about that, worry about it and I think that showing her reaction to something as simple as a her otherness at a party was a refreshing thing to read in a book. People of color are used to it to the point where it's a joke between us but having it be flipped on it's head shows the paradox [is that the right word to use here?]

This reaction that thereby spurred this post is indicative of the larger problem at hand. I shouldn't be screaming "hallelujah!" when I can identify with a character in a book, it should be something that is more commonplace and why it is important this conversation, while maddening at times, continues. The world needs diverse books because each reader's background and complex worldview needs to be represented.

Favorite quotes: Brown Girl Dreaming by Jacqueline Woodson

"Somewhere in my brain
each laugh, tear and lullaby
becomes memory."

"And now coming back home
isn't really coming back home
at all."

"I want to catch words one day. I want to hold them
then blow gently,
watch them float
right out of my hands."

"Even the silence
has a story to tell you.
Just listen. Listen."

The Book of Unknown Americans by Cristina Henriquez

New Favorite Book y'all!

This book is beautiful and so real and I love feeling represented in books I read. It's like authors saying "I see you, I hear you & I understand." One of many examples: "I wasn't allowed to claim the thing I felt and I didn't feel the thing I was supposed to claim." referring to feeling American but not being viewed as one by your peers and the conflicting emotions that follow. This book is an emotional, unique look at the immigrant experience from many perspectives and definitely worth a read.

Here are a few of the other quotes that really resonated with me:

"But when I glanced at the people around us, no one was even looking in our direction, and I felt the way that I often felt in this country-simultaneously conspicuous and invisible, like an oddity whom everyone noticed but chose to ignore."

"The sand, when we came to it, was covered by a dusting of snow. the barreling ocean waves were a silvery blue. we stood side by side and looked out at the vastness, the possibility of everything out there. within the universe, I felt like a speck, but within myself I felt gigantic, the salt air filling my lungs, the roaring of the waves rushing in my ears."

"People do what they have to in this life. We try to get from one end of it to the other with dignity and with honor. We do the best we can."

"We're the unknown Americans, the ones no one even wants to know, because they've been told they're supposed to be scared of us and because maybe if they did take the time to know us, they might realize that we're not that bad, maybe even that we're a lot like them."

January Reads

January was a crazy reading month in that I read 15 pieces of literature: madness! 10 novels, 2 graphic novels and 3 e-novellas.

I started off the year with Glory O' Brien's History of the Future by A.S. King. Certain books are read at a perfect time in a person's life and that is the case with A.S. King's books for me. Glory O'Brien is a cool, weird, quirky, smart girl and it was easy to put myself in her shoes. Her way of thinking like I said was extreme and odd in some points but duh most teenagers have strange thoughts that seem totally valid and poignant at the time. I love the bits of the story she decided to write down from the transmissions she was getting in that it was such a warped fucked up world that is weirdly motivational. Inspirational stuff, man.


I've already deemed The Secret History by Donna Tartt one of my favorites ever. I enjoyed this like I enjoy cake. Eating it slowly and enjoying all the flavor and frosting. I was debating as to whether I was going to give this a 3, 4 or 5 rating and in the end, the only reason why was because of my dislike of the characters throughout most of the novel but that's the point. These aren't likeable people, they're despicable in many aspects and you still grow to care for them. What intrigues me is what if we would've gotten this from Henry's, Camilla's or Francis' point of view? Richard reminded me of Nick from Gatsby in certain ways because while he did not have money. he shows how easy it is to let yourself be taken by it. Therefore, he was the perfect narrator because of the change we got to go through with him. Bunny is a clear picture of the worst kind of person in that even when his family doesn't have that much money, he is so uppity and egotistical. I also loved that Richard is deciding to write this story years after the fact and therefore leaves things to the imagination; it adds so much more to it for me. All in all, I loved this look at the lives of these six people and even the setting of this story (when they kept mentioning typewriters and letters in the mail, I loved that!) I also thought that there had to be a movie adaption of this (because when is there not) and seeing there isn't makes it even better because I can just keep reimagining this world over and over again.


Just One Day,  Just One Year & Just One Night by Gayle Forman is my YA favorite of January and forever and ever amen. Just such a pleasure to read, I needed a good contemporary and this was perfect.  I think the blurb on Goodreads is perfect for this. This book deals with "love, heartbreak, travel, identity, and the “accidents” of fate, Just One Day shows us how sometimes in order to get found, you first have to get lost. . . and how often the people we are seeking are much closer than we know."


This was such a good reading month just coincidentally because I just let myself read whatever sounded interesting. Throne of Glass by Sarah J. Mass had been on my kindle for ages when I bought for a deal and I was on the train and had no book on me so I started reading it on my kindle app and gah this YA fantasy is one that deserves the hype. Celaena Sardothien is a badass assassin. I really enjoyed how sassy she was and her back and forth with Dorian, the King's son, was the best. I loved learning more about her as the story went on and the tests and training went on. I adore her love of books of course and that it's something her and Dorian bonded over. I disliked that she was so unsure of her emotions when it came to Chaol or Dorian. I dislike love triangles but this one didn't feel like one to me because of how she threats each of the guys. Crown of Midnight is the sequel and my favorite of the three I read. Heir of Fire is many people's favorite and I definitely see why because the world building Sarah is doing is breathtaking. This is going to be a six book series and I can see just how so because so much is going to happen and I need the fourth book now!


2015 is the year of Canadian Literature and I started of by reading Ru by Kim Thuy. It's a stunning story that is told in short vignettes which makes it flows so well and when I think about how Ru means stream in French and lullaby in Vietnamese it just personifies both of those words. There's so much meaning to be found in the role of the people the narrator speaks about and her thoughts on a number of topics ranging from being Vietnamese to the American Dream. So good.


The last read of the month was The Walled City by Ryan Graudin and it was so good. What a story. At first, I didn't know what to think of these three people narrating from this entirely different, scary world based off the real Kowloon Walled City that was once a part of Hong Kong but the more I read the more I felt like I could see how suffocating their situation was. Jin, Mei Yee and Dai have all been through so much and they all have these barriers up because of it. This novel is worth a read to unravel their pasts and see how it's led them to where they are and to learn about this city.


Overall, this was such a great start to the year. I took a break for 3 days towards the end of the month and I'm reading the Throne of Glass e-novellas and Station Eleven and enjoying both for totally different reasons.